A Fresh Start - It doesn't have to be a New Year!
"Nooooo! It can't possibly be. I won't have it. No I won't hear of it".
"Calm down Becky, I'm simply telling you the truth. It's over and I'm terribly sorry that I have to be the one to tell you this. John is not coming back. He's moved on and I need you to move on too".
"Sarah, he promised he'd never hurt me, how could he leave me like this, how could he do such a thing and with her, my work colleague? Oh Sarah it hurts so bad".
As great as life can be...Life can be very cruel at times. And the sad reality is that sometimes bad things can happen to very good people, especially from ones that they love, trust and adore.
It may not be a relationship. It my be your career, your academics, and even your health, that may be the cause of pain or set back at the moment. Whatever it may be, when disappointments come, they can leave us feeling overwhelmed, vulnerable, powerless, and shattered.
When these moments come, as in life they inevitably do, it is critical and extremely important for one to take courage and hold on with whatever little hope that is there, even if it is as small as a mustard seed. You must know that NOTHING! NOTHING, not even the worst situations, last forever. And 99% of the time, these crisis situations, and disappointments, as bad as they can be, open doors for opportunities that one would not have seen if the disappointment did not happen. Here’s to A Fresh Start, and a few tips to get you on your way, and it doesn't have to be a New Year!
TIP #1 - Get Outdoors
Get outdoors Now! There is nothing more healing to the mind, body, and spirit than being in the nature, among the fields, trees, plants or even at the beach.
In a study by Chang et al - A lower connection to nature is related to lower mental health benefits from nature contact - results showed that there is strong and positive correlation with contact in nature and "lower levels of stress and anxiety".
"A large body of evidence shows contact with nature (e.g., parks, forests) can be beneficial for mental health and wellbeing."
We don't need a study to reveal the calming effects of beautiful nature. For just the chirping of the birds, the sound of sea crashing on the shore, or the wind blowing through the tress, and massaging our skin; the amazing and majestic sunrise and the warmth and beauty of the colourful sunset is enough to calm all that is around you.
Be purposeful and step out in nature today.
TIP #2 – Let the Pain Be Your Push & Examine the Disappointment with New Eyes!
Sometimes in life the very thing that has caused us to fail or fall can, if seen through optimistic eyes, become the very thing that pushes you forward. I remember when I started my Master’s In Public Health at the end of the first semester of the first year I failed two of the core modules. Let me tell you, no one felt as gutted as I did. It was the failure coupled with the amount of money that had to be paid to retake the entire two modules. That really hurt.
Now did I wallow in self-pity? Of course, I did, but that was only for a time, for I knew that I had to buckle up and enter my second semester with greater zeal and focus.
It was the failure that pushed me to focus and fight harder. I need not explain to you that when I did get the chance to repeat those two modules, I didn’t only complete them with a resounding A and B, but I was able to assist others along the way in explaining concepts that was at first very hard for me to grasp, and I had overwhelming joy seeing these individuals succeed at their first setting.
TIP #3 – Rediscover Who You Are
It is important that when disappointment comes or bad things happen to you, that you rediscover the beauty in who you are. These situations can easily make you feel, less valuable, unwanted, and unworthy, and if you are not careful you can become impregnated with thoughts that can lead to severe depression.
STOP! You must remember your worth is never in material things or in other people. Your worth is in what Christ Jesus has done for you on the Cross. He died for you and that is enough to practice self-love. Speak positive into your life remembering that: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: And they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof” Proverbs 18:21 KJV.
Do NOT surround yourself with persons who continue to encourage self-pity. It is tempting but it can distract and delay you from rediscovering your “beautiful” self.
TIP #4– Plan, Plan, Plan
Don’t be afraid to take the next step forward. As long as you have given yourself enough time to heal, plan your next course of action. It may be that you might need assistance, professional help or just to have a good, trusted friend to shoot some ideas off. Plan and seek whatever help you need so that moving forward, you are focused and prepared for success.
TIP #5– Be a part of a “Community” or Start Your Own “Community”
Yes indeed. It is interesting that when we have passed through many deep waters that it is only then are we better able to help others. It is if the experience gave us not only a new perspective, but it enables us to assist others in ways that we would not otherwise have been able. Use your experience to help others. Either join a community or start one. Scary as that may seem, many persons receive great success and healing as they allow the wounds that they have had to be a means of helping others.
A very good friend of mine wife left him. She took the children and left completely. This Christian man, distraught as he was, started a men’s club. Through that Club many men's lives had been saved. Who know how many of them would have committed suicide had he not started that men’s Club the was birth out of his own pain.
Starting does not have to be anything elaborate. It can simply be meeting once a month or bi-monthly to give support, be a listening ear, be the source of encouragement, assisting persons to refocus or countless other things. You just never know.
TIP #6 – Journaling
Journaling the events as you move toward your goal, the milestones met, the accomplishments, and even and especially the hard hits, bumps and scraps can be a means of inspiration as you reflect back on the journey. Sometimes reflecting and realising how far you came, all that you have accomplished, and all that you have gone through, and conquered, can reinvigorate you and give you the energy, and push you need to move forward.
TIP #7 – Entrust God with your dreams
Remember to entrust God with your desire, dreams and goals. God sees well into the future and already knows what is ahead of you. Don't be afraid to consult with Him and ask His guidance. There is such a thing as Divine Providence. Divine Providence "is the foreseeing care and guidance" (www.dictionary.com) of our Heavenly Father, and we can trust in that care that God has for us to see us through the rough as we journey on to our goal.
"And let the beauty of the The LORD our God be upon us: And establish Thou the work of our hands upon us; yea the work of our hands establish Thou it" Proverbs 90:17 KJV.
BT
Change is Not Always Bad!
In life change is inevitable, but with the right support and right tools anything is possible. Great possibilities can come out of bad situations.